In an ideal world, when a relationship ends we would never want to see our ex again, rather like a dose of ‘love amnesia’. Unfortunately, many of us are forced to see the person repeatedly, whether we like it or not. Perhaps we live in the same town or work at the same office as them, in which case the continual reminder of what we lost (or endured) is both painful and unhelpful. But do not despair: if you want to speed up the healing process, there are a few things you can do to make life a bit more bearable.
Working with your ex
Sharing office space with an ex is the ultimate in tragic break-ups—particularly if they are your boss—and the pain of seeing the person you shared your most intimate moments with every single day can send even the strongest person into a deep depression. So if this is you, ask for a transfer to a new office, or if that isn’t an option, it may be a good time to seek employment elsewhere.
How to get rid of an annoying ex
Stalker exes are annoying in the extreme. In their eyes, you two are still in a relationship, and no matter what you (or anyone else) says to try and persuade them differently, they continue to live in denial. So if your ex spends every waking moment parked outside your home or is bombarding you with creepy messages, you have a few options on the table:
• Take out a restraining order to prevent them from coming anywhere near you. This is a very effective method of discouraging contact from an annoying ex, but if they are seriously unhinged, it may not help.
• Change your phone number – ideal if all contact is via phone or SMS. Just be sure not to let them inadvertently find out your new number.
• Move house – not always the easiest way to lose an ex, but if you can tie a new job into the deal, it’s a great way of moving on in a positive manner. Obviously, moving house comes with its own set of problems, but you can enjoy a fresh start somewhere new.
How to lose a psychotic ex
Some exes are more than just annoying. Psycho exes represent a significant danger to you in the aftermath of your relationship, either because they don’t believe anyone else should have you, or because you cleared out their bank account and ran off with their best friend. But whatever the reason for their homicidal urges, it is a really good idea to make yourself scarce once you tell them it’s over—buy your plane ticket now and say goodbye to your close friends.
Don’t forget to organize mail forwarding so that your ex’s hate letters arrive at your new home (their vitriolic outpourings will serve as compelling evidence should you need to seek protection from local law enforcement agents).